Last year, Otsuka Canada Pharmaceutical Inc., Lundbeck Canada Inc. and the Schizophrenia Society of Canada created the Yes2Me Scholarship Program. The goal of this program is to help those living with schizophrenia achieve their education and career goals. Scholarships were generously awarded to people across Canada, including 14 lucky recipients here in B.C. Sonia Hawkins, age 26, is one of those lucky recipients.
It’s winter in Prince George, two RCMP squad cars pull up to a local pulp mill. They were called by staff concerned with the wellbeing of a young woman they found on-site without proper clothing or footwear for the cold weather – a young woman who has been hearing voices.
“The voices started in high school and were constantly putting me down and making fun of me,” explains Sonia Hawkins. “I thought it was normal and that everyone had this delusional thinking. I didn’t know any better.” These voices told her to hop trains, that she was in a movie and it was her job to entertain them, that the world was full of aliens, to leave home and if she didn’t believe or follow their orders that they would kill her. Everything revolved around her being killed.
“People can only do so much. Unless you’re going to trust someone you can’t take a step forward,” states Sonia. The officers that day ended up having to perform a take down on her as she was trying to run away. They took her to the local hospital where she was released. When Sonia was committed after she tried to commit suicide, she was diagnosed with schizophrenia.
Until this incident, her family didn’t know of any family members diagnosed with schizophrenia, but then they learned that her grandmother’s brother died in an asylum overseas. However, nothing can be confirmed or verified. Since Sonia’s diagnosis, her younger brother has also been diagnosed with schizophrenia.
Sonia experienced one other psychotic episode and this second one was a more intense episode than the first. It included tactile hallucinations and other illusions that left Sonia with some brain damage; affecting her ability to read, write and speak. It took time for her to recover, but through her persistence, Sonia is now able to speak, read, write and draw again.
“I first heard about B.C. Schizophrenia Society (BCSS) through Omineca Mental Health and Addictions Advisory Committee,” says Sonia. Heather Megchelsen, the BCSS Regional Educator for the area, supports this committee and the local mental health and addictions clubhouse. “Heather encouraged me to get out of my shell and invited me to go along with her to high school talks. She let me become involved and it meant a lot to me.” By giving her a chance to change the lives of others, Heather showed Sonia that she was capable of doing more than just sitting at home.
Schizophrenia changes lives. It changes the lives of those diagnosed with it, their friends and their family. “The biggest challenge you are ever going to face is your own mindset,” Sonia explains. “It’ll be more about how you perceive yourself than how others perceive you. All our assumptions about how others perceive us and what we can achieve is based on our own confidence in our abilities to take on the tasks.”
“Sonia was involved in the Omineca Lakes District Mental Health & Addictions Advisory Committee,” explains Heather. “Her ideas have sparked great projects which have enhanced and empowered the lives of many people who suffer with mental illness and/or addictions,” Heather continued. Sonia created and facilitated an art course for people with mental illness and addictions, and was key in helping BCSS collaborate with local groups to run peer support services for people with mental illness.
Sonia uses art and drawing as a coping mechanism and credits her ability to find freedom of expression without words as key to helping her graduate high school. The Yes2Me Scholarship Program helped Sonia enroll in the 2D Animation and Digital Art program offered through the Kelowna Centre for Arts and Technology; a program that will begin next month. Sonia is excited to further develop her skills.
Today, Sonia remains active and optimistic in challenging the misconceptions around schizophrenia. She continues to volunteer with local BCSS initiatives and hopes to one day provide illustrations for books geared towards youth. She also wants to use her skills and experiences to create animations and movies that will change how people think, ultimately inspiring change and hope.
“When you hit rock bottom, you find out there is a new level of bottom. The only way to get out of the cycle is to fight to get out of it. It’s not a crime to ask for help when you need it. It’s nearly impossible sometimes to see past the problem. And the best thing you can do when you’re doing well is to help the person at the bottom. If we all work together, be each other’s support network to contact, and build up our support network. It won’t be that dreadful.”
B.C. Schizophrenia Society’s Educators, like Heather, help families affected by schizophrenia every day. Heather provided Sonia the resources and support to change her life. Please donate to B.C. Schizophrenia Society today so we can continue to give people like Sonia a means to cope and a reason to hope.